By Piason Maringwa
God in his cleverness created us with a certain attitude which makes us forget certain realities until we are face to face with worldly calamities.
Everyday people pass through or near mortuaries, hospitals, prisons and other such places without ever imagining that one day they might be guests at those places which is good for our mental health because if we spent our time thinking about them out lives would be very miserable.
It is beneficial though to sometimes think about those places because one day anyone of us might be shocked to find ourselves there.
I had never imagined myself in a hospital bed before but in September 1999 I was a patient at St Luke’s Hospital near Lupane and would be there for nearly four months undergoing TB treatment. I can say with certainty that some people have died from the shock of just being on a hospital bed.
The fear of sleeping on a bed where someone has died before can sometimes shock someone to death.
Good health is a season which passes and is usually followed by a season of poor or ill health. Everyone should be prepared for both sides of the health calender so as not to be taken by surprise when ill health hits hard and by surprise.
Many HIV+ people find it very hard to accept their new status even though they expected others to be brave before them when they were ill.I remember how I felt towards my friend suffering from AIDs and how groaned and moaned with pain and how I thought how much a nuisance he was to everyone seeking a lot of attention from all around him even when we wanted to go and enjoy ourselves.
There is one thing I have liked about HIV/AIDs it doesn’t discriminate when it affects people .It attacks everyone indiscriminately tall, short, rich, poor, child or adult. It wasn’t long after my friend had died that it was my turn to be hit hard by a similar situation though I had yet to learn that it was HIV I was suffering from.
Problem with many HIV+ people is that we suffer from the victim mentality which makes it difficult for us to cope with our new positive status .Most of us want to find someone to blame for our affliction yet most of us are to blame because like in my case I have noone to blame hence I have had to learn to dance to my music.
There are many disadvantages of adopting the blame mentality because it makes one a real victim and diverts one’s attention from reality making treatment and coping really difficult .One should learn to accept reality and learn to cope with the new situation. Feeling sorry for yourself or expecting sympathy from other people will not help at all.
HIV/AIDs can come with many horrible afflictions which can make even your friends and relatives shun you .AIDs can come with many debilitating diseases like various types of very ugly cancers and other such very frightening conditions which will make you a tourist attraction to those who are still enjoying good health .
Doctors are very strong people because they come across many terrible and frightening situations which many of us would not want to be close to. I know of a young HIV+ lady who was struck by cancer that destroyed much of her private parts making going to the toilet very difficult or almost impossible.
In such a situation only those that really love you can spare the time to be with you so you have to be with yourself all the time and only death can bring relief to you . Usually death takes very long to come under such circumstances and all you have to do is wait patiently.
I know that most adults have many frightening stories to tell about the horrible diseases they have witnessed since the advent of HIV/AIDS. People have died very miserably though it’s now very encouraging to see that many positive changes have come as a result of the many intervention efforts being made in the HIV/AIDs war.
We must all try to avoid negative feelings which make us victims hence create a feeling of pity for ourselves. Every HIV person should be brave enough and face his situation bravely. Feeling pity for oneself will only worsen the situation
