A man’s handsomeness is in his pocket and not necessarily in his physical appearance.
Any man can sleep with any lady, girl or woman of his choice at any time he so wishes as long as his pocket is full of money.
Fame and money are the key ingrediency where sex is concerned and many men have taken advantage of their financial muscle to have sexual relationships with many ladies and in some instances clandestinely with married women even though they are known by everyone to be HIV positive.
Discordant relationships are those where one of the partners is HIV positive and the other one is not and the two knowingly choose to live together as casual partners or as a married couple. These kind of relationships need lots of understanding and a willingness to accept whatever comes therefrom. Partners may decide to move on with their relationship with full knowledge that one of them is HIV positive and the other is not.
Some engage in protected sex and some go the whole way through leaving everything to fate. In some instances these sexual relationships end up with both partners becoming positive and in some rare instances the negative partner continues to be negative.
There are cases where one partner decides not to disclose to the other their positive statuses and the relationship subsists innocently for years and ends up with both parties testing positive or with the other remaining negative.
The other scenerio is where one partner is a known HIV case and in some cases very ill with all the physical symptoms evident but that partner is very wealthy and decides to have unprotected sex because it’s sweeter and the other partner usually the female decides to take the risk and engages in sex for the money. Many cases have been recorded where this kind of sexual activity has taken place.
I have witnessed several cases where healthy ladies have slept with HIV positive men full of festering wounds and other frightening physical appearances because of the money offered. Some married people deny their sick HIV positive partners intimacy thinking that they are being kind to them yet that is not true you can’t be kind to someone by denying them food.
There are a lot of very sick looking men and women out there who still crave for sex and if they are denied it and are still mobile they can look for it elsewhere. Married people denying your sick partner intimacy is not kindness it’s cruelty. Make deliberate efforts to give it to them until they show that they are nolonger able to.
There have been cases where two people fall in love but choose not get tested until they are married or until they begin to engage in intimate sex or when the lady get pregnant and tests positive. When this happens it will be difficult to stop or go for testing and if one of the partners is positive then the two will live as a discordant couple until when they one tests positive and requests the other to get tested as well and that’s when all hell will break loose.
When I tested HIV positive back then in the early 2000s and when my wife refused to get tested we had to live as a discordant couple for over 18 years doing protected sex throughout that period.
I was afraid of infecting my wife and had to inform her about my being positive before we could resume any sexual activities after I had recovered from a terrible TB bout. Honesty and truth like I always say are key to anything to do with health related issues .
Our current situation demands lots of understanding in issues to do with marriages and sexual relationships because of various challenges bedeviling the marriage landscape. Returning illegal and legal immigrants are bringing with them HIV which they acquired while they were in the diaspora and they are coming back home to their partners who have also acquired HIV while their partners where away in the diaspora so it’s honestly a catch 22 situation we have here.
The best foot forward for all involved is understanding and tolerance before anything else. Fighting, blaming and divorce are counterproductive moves that will only worsen an already volatile situation. Calm and restraint are key components of healthy situations and no amount of jostling and heckling will bring normalcy to an already broken relationship. Let’s adopt tolerance, acceptance and forgiveness above all other moves and make the most of our remaining relationships.
Piason Maringwa
+263774322043
